Thanks, Cadburys

I am aware that I am falling further behind in my plans for this month's article, so was very fortunate when my uni reading lent me some inspiration for direction. Back at uni means it is harder to just daydream my way through thought processes. I like to take my time and let things just arrive in my mind as they do. This is lovely for my id, but the need for social approval that I have means I feel I should speed up the process.

I have realised that I am often feeling pressure from the world around me. However, it is not like this is pressure that is decidedly placed on me. It is more of a subconscious sense of obligation. Yes, I have to go to that party. Yes, I have to fit those three events into one day. Yes, I have to do more at work than I am contracted to do.

And it isn't a matter of me not wanting to be involved with activities, events and people. It is more of a pressure that I feel that if I don't, I am not a good person, friend or employee. It might not sound so dire while you are reading it, in fact even I think I'm being a drama queen as I reread it, but stop a moment and think. How many times have you been laying on bed on a Saturday, aware that you have to get up to be at your friend's BBQ and thought 'I don't really want to go' (insert whiny voice). I mean, you know you will have fun when you get there and all, but you would rather have a day in bed and to get a few things done after a hectic work week. Then you realise that you need to put petrol in the car so you can get there, and stop at the supermarket to bring what you a bring when you're told not to bring a thing

Thanks for the additional social pressure, Cadbury
(photo from www.colinskyba.com)

Ack, even more effort. And with that in mind, it means that you are now running late and have to rush to go to an event where, if you could choose to do anything, you might have still gone to. But because you feel obliged, it is an effort.

What about work? You know you are there and paid from 9-5. But your boss usually stays late, so you hang back a little later and later each day. You have your role that you are employed to do, but there are those little add ons that seem to pop up that are hard to say no to (sure, you can be the unpaid volunteer WHS rep for office, no worries). It isn't that you can't say no- in fact, if they tried to fire you for not doing those extras they wouldn't have a leg to stand on. You might even find workplace health and safety utterly riveting. The niggling feeling in you is the one that says 'you have to say yes. It is the socially correct thing to do'.

This is where the concept of superego has lead me this week.

According to psychology.about.com, the superego is "the component of personality composed of our internalized ideals that we have acquired from our parents and from society". In other words, it is the things that makes sure we do not isolate ourselves from society and our networks by doing the crazy shit that our id and ego would much rather be doing. It is not something we are born with, it is something that is built through our social interactions from the moment we are born.

I am guessing this can then lead to psycho-social theories and all kinds of fun, but I'll get to that in another post.

My real interest in the superego for this month is just where is the line between what is my superego and what is 'me'. Also, are the things my superego holds onto helpful to my journey of self-actualisation or detrimental? No doubt it is both, but I would like to have some more specifics.

Back to it, will be posting again soon!